Something felt incomplete about my last post. It felt like those times where I have to write 2 or 3 pages of nothing before I can come to one true sentence. And I throw the rest out & start anew with that one sentence. However, in my previous post, I stopped before I got to that one sentence. The truth is, the truth I've been scared to admit, is that I was disappointed with the U2 concert. How could I have been disappointed? It was U2 live! My all-time favorite band! I paid big money & traveled several hours just to hear & see them sing afar for two and a half hours. Did I meet them? No. Do they know I exist? No. Does that matter? No.
So, yes, I was disappointed. I suppose I set myself up for it. I went into it searching for the spiritual experience I had at the U2 concert in Seattle. I had expectations of meeting up with God & dancing with Him in the aisles. But that was 4 years ago. A lot has happened in the last four years – in my life, in the lives of U2, in our world. 9/11 happened 5 months after the Seattle concert & the world hasn't been the same since. But God is the same right?
So I went to the Chicago concert longing for God & left disappointed because He didn't show up, at least not as I expected Him too. But looking back, I can say with confidence that He was there. I'm not sure where He was, that wasn't so obvious to me as it was in Seattle, but after the concert, as we were walking back to our hotel and drunk kids were stumbling and staggering in front of us, & we were praying we wouldn't have to see one of them walk into the street & get hit by a bus, I knew He was among us, among all of us, especially those who couldn't walk a straight line. So we walked back to our hotel, fell into bed & I can't remember when I've slept deeper. It's been a long time coming. And now, life is back to normal back home... it's 1 a.m. & I'm still “wide awake”...
U2 are spiritual figures for me. Bono is all about peace and unity & meeting the needs of the poor & sick. He's a voice for the hopeless when they have no voice. He's no Mother Theresa but who knows, maybe he would have been one of Jesus' disciples if he'd been alive when Jesus was. God has given him a gift & he's faithful to his call. Who knows, maybe he's a modern day prophet? Prophets were human weren't they – sinners like the rest of us? I don't have Bono on a pedestal; I just admire him greatly for his work, his faith & his spiritual journey. I admire that in all the band members. And, I know, the truth is, I don't really know any of them. But what I do know, I have great respect for.
So the real truth, one of those nugget sentences I never reached in my previous post, is that I'm longing for God. I went searching for him in Chicago & found Him after all. The experience made me long for God & yearn for Him to show up. It has made me take a look at my own life & work, and pray that God will make me faithful to the unique calling He has for me. So I'm grateful. Grateful to have longing for God. Grateful for the concert to have intensified that for me.